Privacy and safety, spelled out.
Co-parenting can be hard and sometimes unsafe. Here's exactly who sees what in Orderly.
| What | You | Your co-parent, if linked | In exports |
|---|---|---|---|
| Coach chats and hints | Yes | Never | Never |
| Shared messages | Yes | Yes | If you include them |
| Calendar and agreement | Yes | Yes, once you both accept | If you include them |
| Files you upload to set up your order | Yes | No | No |
You don't have to link.
Everything works on your own. If you have a protective order, you don't have to link. Invite emails don't include names, children or case details, and invite links expire in 7 days.
Messages are permanent.
Once sent, messages can't be edited or unsent, by you or by them. Read receipts can be turned off only if you both agree.
Quiet by default.
Notifications don't show message text unless you turn that on. Orderly doesn't show online status or location.
Ending a link.
You can unlink at any time. You both keep read-only history. "Unlink and block" stops new invites for 30 days, and you can unblock at any time. We don't tell them why. They only see "Link ended."
About Coach.
Coach works from your account: your order, your calendar and the shared thread you can already see. It doesn't see your co-parent's private Coach chats or anything private to them. It may learn communication patterns from messages in your shared thread, or from pastes you mark as from them. What it learns is shown to no one, and you can reset it or turn it off. Coach can be wrong, and it can't give legal advice.
Records.
You can make a records export on your phone to share with your lawyer. We don't keep a copy. Exports aren't certified, and whether anything is used in a legal matter is up to the people involved, not Orderly.
If you're in danger.
Call 911 or your local emergency number. In the US, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233.